Story #63. Love’s Just a Feeling

Hi there :- )

 

When I don’t know where else to go, Starbucks is always being my best choice. My favorite spot is fall to the one in Karawaci next to Benton Junction, and another one is close to Pasar Baru, Jakarta. I had my all time pleasure: Caramel Machiato. Ice. Grande. I do exercise but can’t help myself to reject hundreds of calories within, LoL ! Macchiato is an Italian word meaning “marked.” Perhaps there’s a story why an American franchisee put Italian name for the menus. I’m a coffee lover, but I don’t drink black. I like it smooth, sweet, and strong at the same time, like when the espresso hit the milk and blend with the caramel sauce.

 

I sat down at the corner, prepare my self to read a book, but I can’t. Guess I’m not in a good mood to read. I saw bunch of whatsapp notification on the phone screen. The number of notifications can be the same as the number of calories in my coffee. I’ll check them later. I went to youtube, instead. Check on Lindsey Stirling and found “Love’s just a feeling”.

 

Cause love’s just a feeling
Some kind of emotion
When you need the healing
When you’re all broken
Don’t overthink it
But for the moment live slowly

 

I wonder Is it really as simple as what she said? Well I remembered my dating record. Love is really just some kind of emotion that in term of hormonal can boost my mood in almost everything I do. Make me feel like   “I wanna fall like I won’t hit the ground, I wanna dance like nobody’s around, Walk on the edge and not look down, Follow my heart and lose my head into the clouds”.

 

Love is persist, it’s the man keep come and go. I fall, I broke my heart, I get heal, and then I fall again. The circle is bullshit but it’s the truth. As time goes by, I try not to overthink about it. I live the moment slowly, every moment, indeed. Each one of them are worth to live. Even that I have to face a hard time through it, love is really some kind of emotion with a fragile consequences. I was once feel like I’ll never be able to live again, I mean I’m not the same person as I ever was. I realize I do not change, I just grow up becoming somebody stronger. I’m not afraid to fall again. I hold my hands up, Afraid of so much. It’s time I let it all go, Maybe I’ve lost touch. In all the blind love. I’m gonna let it all go.

 

Cause love’s just a feeling
Don’t overthink it

But for the moment live slowly!

 

I sip my coffee, I love the espresso touch within. Kind of strong emotion that you can only taste it at the tip of the tongue.

 

Ciao!

See you in my next episode of life.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlYVNyq2i_0

Story #62. Born To Die


Come and take a walk on the wild side. Let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain. You like your girls insane. Choose your last words.

This is the last time… ‘Cause you and I, we were born to die… (Lana del Ray)

Hey,
This is such a nice place in the morning! Been months I spent my sunday morning here for falun dafa, but don’t talk to me about my consistency practicing falun dafa. I am at the lowest level. Some people practicing yoga and tai chi here, and also aerobic 😅. Yeah, aerobic. The one with a loud music. Hard beat, also screams sometimes, while other excercises use only such instrumental. I sit down here waiting for my partner to come. With that loud music from the aerobic corner, I find it is not easy to concentrate here, but it’s a challange , I guess. Whatever. I used to come to this place years ago, spent the night with bunch of friends. I was early 20es, young, naif, and stupid! Late in the afternoon till drop this place is a hawker center. There are some restaurant as well, including two fancy korean restaurant, which I don’t like any, for me, Bornga is still the best! 

Sometimes I wonder and imagine randome things. Like the second I sit  here, listening to Lana del Ray singing we were born to die. My memory’s back to random moments in the past. What should a human do in their live if we were only born to die? What do they search? Why can’t we choose the way we die? I remember my 10years old nephew give a thought about death, he said “What makes people die? I mean, in what term God is taking someone’s live? A new born baby can die as well as an adult die cause of ill. A baby isn’t yet living a life, an adult might not yet enough time to do good things for people around, not enough chances to do awesome things in life. Kalo aku yang meninggal gimana? Baru umur segini, rasanya naik bajaj aja belom tau.” It was a stupid couple minute shocking moment for me as I never expect such question come from a kid. 

Well, technically we’re all were born to die. But life is about how we live the life, how we feel, how we deal. I believe that before we born, we’re all a free spirit. And then right before the universe magically blows us into a woman’s womb, turn us into fetus, we have had deal about whatever we face in life. It include happy and sad, up and down, consequences of options we take, chances, wtf. The second we born, it was like we push a reset button. We don’t remember what we had deal with the universe. We’re all an empty mind, growth to learn and to search our own meaning in life. To feel pain, to live the drama, to fullfil the emptyness of our souls. 

I’ve walk at the darkest and wildest side of my life. I can’t see what’s in front of me, all I know is to keep walking… 

…Would you walk with me? Be alive with me, let me kiss you hard under the pouring rain… We can lay down somewhere under the sky, don’t you know every second we look up to the sky is a handmade view from the universe just for us? If there’s another second I look up after you kiss my lips, the universe capture me another view. I wanna hear you whisper me your last word, perhaps this is the last time, cause we were born to die.

Ciao!

See you in the next stories 😉

Story #49. HAILEE STEINFELD feat ZEDD: STARVING

Hi there,

Again, I get caught by a song. I was working on my design when I first time hear this song. The melody is nice, I always love an acoustic ballad like I hear in the beginning of the song. And the lyrics… wow…exactly describe what I’m feeling at the moment 🙂 Check this song by this link The lyrics is simply amazing. I wonder the story of behind this song, cause it addicted to listen.

You know just what to say
Shit, that scares me
I should just walk away but I can’t move my feet
The more that I know you, the more I want to
Something inside me’s changed
I was so much younger yesterday, oh

I didn’t know that I was starving ’til I tasted you
Don’t need no butterflies when you give me the whole damn zoo
By the way, by the way, you do things to my body
I didn’t know that I was starving ’til I tasted you

You know just how to make my heart beat faster
Emotional earthquake, bring on disaster
You hit me head on, got me weak in my knees
Yeah, something inside me’s changed
I was so much younger yesterday, aye
So much younger yesterday, oh, yeah

As I might have an at least silver medal for a fall record, this song is execute a feeling in to words. A feeling to fall with somebody new. Very new one. Make my heart beat faster, totally bring disaster cause he messed up my mind.  The words “I didn’t know that I was starving ’til I tasted you” is the best I wanna hear today as i am trapped in such moment.

Happy weekend, everyone!

See you in my next episode of life,

Ciao!

Story #33. Have I Told You Lately That I Love You? Another jazz song. Annoying song, I love this song!

Hello jazzy fellows 🙂

Again, I stopped by a catchy song. I was working on my artwork layout then this song comes up. The title is “Have I Told You Lately That I love You”. I was listening to Jazz Female Indonesia, then Sierra Soetedjo bewitch me by her voice, singing this song. Find out her voice here

I’m melting by the lyrics, the i found that Rod Steward is the original singer (ehm, hope it’s right, i just check it on youtube). This song is probably exist decades ago, when my parents were on date I guess. Oldie, enchant, mesmerize, whatever…. *if I live in cartoon then I must say those words with a folded hands, wink my eyes, and my feet pop up like Minnie Mouse down below* LOL!

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And so… let me share you the melting lyrics here:

Have I Told You Lately That I Love You Lyrics

Have I told you lately that I love you?
Have I told you there’s no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness
Ease my troubles, that’s what you doFor the morning sun in all it’s glory
Meets the day with hope and comfort too
You fill my life with laughter, somehow you make it better
Ease my troubles, that’s what you doThere’s a love that’s divine
And it’s yours and it’s mine
Like the sun
And at the end of the day
We should give thanks and pray
To the one, to the oneHave I told you lately that I love you?
Have I told you there’s no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away all my sadness
Ease my troubles, that’s what you doThere’s a love that’s divine
And it’s yours and it’s mine
Like the sun
And at the end of the day
We should give thanks and pray
To the one, to the one

Have I told you lately that I love you?
Have I told you there’s no one else above you?
Fill my heart with gladness, take away my sadness
Ease my troubles, that’s what you do

Take away all my sadness, fill my life with gladness
Ease my troubles, that’s what you do

Songwriters: MORRISON, VAN
Have I Told You Lately lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC
See you in the next episodes,
Ciao :-*

Story # 32. Be Yourself – a Justin Bieber song written by Ed Sheeran

Hello there,

I get caught by this catchy song. First, the electric guitar ballad. Second, it’s the so true lyrics. I love the lyrics so much. I was surprise when I know that Justin Bieber is the singer. I was like “ah, Justin? how come he sing a pure song? i mean without too many music effect like he always do!”, but then I know that Ed Sheeran is involved in writing this break up song lyrics. Well, Ed of course this song is his style 100%.

Here i dropped the lyrics so i can tell you why i love this song:

“Love Yourself”
click here to find out the official video.

For all the times that you rain on my parade
And all the clubs you get in using my name
You think you broke my heart, oh girl for goodness sake
You think I’m crying on my own, well I ain’t
If you ever been in a kind of relationship that your lover taking advantage of your life and in the end your lover thought you’re crying for her/his left but you’re not, this part tells you that.
And I didn’t wanna write a song
Cause I didn’t want anyone thinking I still care
I don’t but, you still hit my phone up
And baby I be movin’ on
And I think you should be somethin’
I don’t wanna hold back, maybe you should know that
You didn’t make any update status on social media (this case we’re just a common citizen, unlike musician who can create songs for their any kind of heart situation, LOL). No status update, didn’t write a song to avoid a though that you still take a shit on your ex-lover. You know, like the old saying: ignoring is the most cruel way to punish someone. Your ex-lover should know that you’re already moving on and your ex should make him/her-self useful. Be something! Get a life!
My mama don’t like you and she likes everyone
And I never like to admit that I was wrong
And I’ve been so caught up in my job, didn’t see what’s going on
But now I know, I’m better sleeping on my own
Mama is the closest person who will assess your lover. Mama don’t like you and she likes everyone i guess it means your lover really unworthy. You’ve been busy living in your own world, you didn’t see what’s going on, guess you’re trying to enjoy the -fake- togetherness between. Better sleeping on my own because your lover existence is meaningless to you. He/she is just using you.
Cause if you like the way you look that much
Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself
And if you think that I’m still holdin’ on to somethin’
You should go and love yourself
It’s a confirmation of the previous lyric that your ex lover should love his/her-self more. You don’t need him/her anymore, you don’t even hanging on memories about you two anymore.
And when you told me that you hated my friends
The only problem was with you and not them
And every time you told me my opinion was wrong
And tried to make me forget where I came from

One of my ex kind of this shit. Telling he/she hated your friends, trying to take your life away from your friends. You’re free to make friends with anyone as long as you can take care of yourself. Anyone who try to separate you from what and who you likes to be with deserve to be in a jail or something.

And I didn’t wanna write a song
Cause I didn’t want anyone thinking I still care
I don’t but, you still hit my phone up
And baby I be movin’ on
And I think you should be somethin’
I don’t wanna hold back, maybe you should know that

Again, don’t want to make an impression that you still care about him/her.
My mama don’t like you and she likes everyone
And I never like to admit that I was wrong
And I’ve been so caught up in my job, didn’t see what’s going on
But now I know, I’m better sleeping on my own Cause if you like the way you look that much
Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself
And if you think that I’m still holdin’ on to somethin’
You should go and love yourself [Instrumental]  The dance is awesome :-*
For all the times that you made me feel small
I fell in love, now I feel nothin’ at all
Had never felt so low when I was vulnerable
Was I a fool to let you break down my walls? 

Somehow love wake up the wonky inside you. Make you jumpy wondering small stuff.

Cause if you like the way you look that much
Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself
And if you think that I’m still holdin’ on to somethin’
You should go and love yourself
Cause if you like the way you look that much
Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself
And if you think that I’m still holdin’ on to somethin’
You should go and love yourself

 

Well, that’s all from me. I’m not exactly a haters of Justin, I like some of his song like What Do You Mean. I just thought that his voice is good, but not more, and then he’s music is about too many sound effect or anything it called i don’t know what to name it. But I like this song so much anyway! 🙂

Ciao,

See you in the next episode of life stories ^.^

 

Story #29. Happy Birthday, Agnes

Today, a year ago, i had my final interview in the family company which i still work for them till now. The word “family” refer to the boss family of course, not mine. There are up and down during the year.

Today, two years ago. I prepared myself for a marriage. Thank God it didn’t happen, he’s nothing but a badass. Now i’m glad that he’s just a history. I face bad days for a few months before i finally be strong and brave enough to get up. Get back my lost life.

Today, five years ago. I made a choice to have  a carrer instead of working in a field that i actually love it so bad. Left the one i love too. Thinking that i’m a big girl and no need anyone to worry about me.

Today, eight years ago. University life feels so good. I enjoy every moment that time: Dumb, silly, crazy, depressed, laugh out loud, crying for stupid reasons. Hahaa… Well i also remember i punch someone in the face, i remember his shocked face! Gotcha! This is also my first time become a tutor.

Today, seventeen years ago. I met bunch of crazy girls that we name ourself “rock fam” till today sometimes we met. Best friend forever.

Today, twenty years ago. OMG i was 10years old and often imagine what would i look like when i’m in the university or even older like 30 years old or so. I was wearing a white shirt and skirt, black shoes, white socks. I put a white bandana in my head. I get my first communion.

Today, twenty six years ago. Mama stop working as a nurse and decide to full take care of me and my bro. Papa takes us move from yogya to jakarta. I was often crying when papa leave home for work. I guess that’t the start of i’m became a maudlin one.

Today, 30 years ago. I was born. My parent name me Agnes Enggar Pratiwi, before then I add “Audrey” before “Agnes”.

Today, 29 Oct 2015, before the day end I’d like to thank God for His grace. He know me better than i knew myself. His love is real and has no end. I was lost but He’ve found me.

Dear God, sometimes i feel like i know what i want and what i need. But You know me better than i know myself, I have some plan to spend every minute, hours, days, years, but i realize that You own me. Now i pray to You to guide me, i’ll be an empty paper and You’ll be the pen. I give you my whole life story. I’ll stop asking things that i decide, because You know better what’s best for me. About family, mine isn’t perfect but by this imperfection we may find Your love in each of us. About career, it’s up to You, God. Position isn’t everything. In fact i can have better life while dissmissing the position. About soulmate, don’t mind it. Even if i’m just all alone till my last breath i know for sure You’ll take care of me. But in case You prepare someone to spend our rest of life in togetherness I believe You’ll let us met when You’re done fixing me. Just make us met at Your time, whenever it is I don’t mind. God, there’s one thing You know i can only asked it deep in my heart. You gave me more than I deserve and I thank you for that one. Like Katy Perry said “there’s a rainbow after a hurricane” so with the moment i face, i find Your blessing in disguise.

Happy Birthday to myself.
“..and this is not over
There’s time
There’s still so much time..”

Story #26. Must Listen to this Jazz song: “Maybe”

Hello,

Lately i often listening to jazz song while working and i found this song accidentally. This song was sang by Monita, success to catch my attention. You can listen it up by this link and this is the lyrics

Maybe

The mistesy, the misery

That was I see, that magicly never give up all the gold memory

If you’re maybe the one to be who promised me under big tree

Then we’ll be fine together happily

So, maybe we can bang together

Or (then), maybe we can fly the car

Then (or), maybe underneath the brand new life the answer will come simply straight as a life

The one in my heart


***

By this couple days i’ve been listen it up for about 10 times! The song and the way Monita’s sing it has deliver my….mmm…what can i call it, childhood dream and imagination about the magic of love? : p hahahha….

Ciao!

Story #16. Song lyrics tell you lot: Last Kiss by Taylor Swift

Hi,

I was working on my visual layout when I hear this song and having kind of mix feeling when I listen to the lyrics. Silly but true. Funny and I guess at least once in a lifetime girls have this moment. It honestly remind me to one moment ever happen in my life. So i write it down and tell you how I interprets this song and how its every words crossed in my thought. Taylor Swift’s songs for me are always damn true ^.^

“Last Kiss”
By Taylor Swift

I still remember the look on your face
Lit through the darkness at 1:58
The words that you whispered
For just us to know
You told me you loved me
So why did you go away?
Away
*When you’re in love, you keep telling your lover how much you love each other. But then when one leave the other there’s a question that you both will never satisfy with the answer: why did you go away? Well love comes first, brain comes later. Love is because you love, leave is because you’re start use your brain for logical thought.
I do recall now the smell of the rain
Fresh on the pavement
I ran off the plane
That July 9th
The beat of your heart
It jumps through your shirt
I can still feel your arms
*Aahh.. I won’t comment on this one. I guess this is when Taylor was  flew to attend a Jonas Brothers show, her ex. “Can still feel your arms” yeah, that’s romantic.But now I’ll go sit on the floor
Wearing your clothes
All that I know is
I don’t know how to be something you miss
I never thought we’d have a last kiss
Never imagined we’d end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips

*When you left your lover behind, you flash back to where you both first met, how you starts the relationship. No body has imagination of how’s the relationship ended. No one expect it in the early of relationship. I don’t know how to be something you miss (ga ada ide gimana lw bisa melewatkan gw. Kata-kata ini biasanya diucapkan oleh pihak yang ditinggalkan.. : p ), it’s an expression of disappointed of my/yourself as an ex.

I do remember the swing of your step
The life of the party, you’re showing off again
And I roll my eyes and then
You pull me in
I’m not much for dancing
But for you I did

Because I love your handshake, meeting my father
I love how you walk with your hands in your pockets
How you kissed me when I was in the middle of saying something
There’s not a day I don’t miss those rude interruptions

*This is my favourite part! Perhaps because I’m a type of cool (read: indifferent) but I pay attention on the detail. Still on your flash back, you’ll remember so much simple little things when you’re together, such swing of each step, maybe the touch of the hands, and a special simple moment between you two. Special isn’t always romantic, could be a silly and fool moment but you both enjoy it. That moment for Taylor must be very memorable, she even remember her expression at the moment. “I’m not much for dancing, but for you I did” That’s happen to a lot of couple I guessed, small stuff that means a lot. In the name of loving you, I dance. In the name of loving you, I’ll cross the ocean! LOL : ))

And I’ll go sit on the floor
Wearing your clothes
All that I know is
I don’t know how to be something you miss
Never thought we’d have a last kiss
Never imagined we’d end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips

So I’ll watch your life in pictures like I used to watch you sleep
And I feel you forget me like I used to feel you breathe
And I keep up with our old friends just to ask them how you are
Hope it’s nice where you are

*This still the words of disappointed and no idea how come the relationship ended up that way. I don’t know either mine. On the part when Taylor say that she’s keep up with the old friend I think it’s a reality part that life must go on. You and I are no longer lover but each other are deserve to continue a good life, move on, and let go the past. Just hoping that you have a fine life too, where ever your are. This is a good, sincere wish for the ex, rather than you curse and hate your ex. Be peace at any possible moment you could.

And I hope the sun shines
And it’s a beautiful day
And something reminds you
You wish you had stayed
You can plan for a change in weather and time
But I never planned on you changing your mind

*For sure that after your down, sad, disappointed moment after a break up you start a new wish for your own life. It’s your everyday decision of a plan for a change. This part is saying a message that as an ex, I never planned on you changing your mind. If you’re already break up, just don’t look back. Sometimes in your life you remember your ex(s), but it only remembered, never mean to go back to the past, change your mind and be a lover again. Eeeuuhhh… back to “former lover” is a big no way!! Just remember if you don’t know how to be something that he/she had missed, then in the future you’ll never know too.

So I’ll go sit on the floor
Wearing your clothes
All that I know is
I don’t know how to be something you miss
Never thought we’d have a last kiss
Never imagined we’d end like this
Your name, forever the name on my lips

Just like our last kiss
Forever the name on my lips
Forever the name on my lips

Just like our last…

*Try to flash back, and answer this: Do you have your last kiss before a break up?

 

Happy reading,

Nice to share,

Ciao : )

Story#2: Les Piano. Yamaha Music School

Hello..

Story #2, kali ini gw mau share tentang Yamaha Music School. Tentunya, karawaci lagiiiii… (horeee karawaci!!). Kebetulan keponakan gw kelas 2 SD adalah siswa di Yamaha Music School yang letaknya di Supermall Karawaci. Minggu 8 Feb ini, jam 9.40 adalah hari ujiannya. Katanya deg-deg an tapi mukanya cengengesan :p

Berawal dari inisiatif bapak dari keponakan gw untuk ngelesin piano, terpilihlah Yamaha Music School. Di awal pendaftaran dikenakan biaya sebesar RP850.000,- dengan rincian sbb:

– Biaya kelas pertama RP500.000,-(dibayar dimuka, Begitu juga untuk bulan selanjutnya)

– Bayar buku (dapet CD juga buat latihan di rumah) seharga RP350.000,- (idealnya setiap 1 buku akan selesai dalam jangka waktu 6bulan. Setelah selesai 1 buku, lanjut buku dg level lebih tinggi. Jangan lupa bayar lagi sesuai harga buku ya.)

Itu kurang lebihnya di 1 tahun yang lalu.. Kalo sekarang ada beda harga ya wajarlah ya. Dengan membayar segitu, dapet tas slempang merah dengan logo dan font Yamaha. Keponakan gw ambil kelas privat, pertemuan 1x dalam seminggu @30menit. Wah, bayar segitu pertemuan cuma 2 jam/bulan? Ya, jadi gini, setiap pertemuan siswa diajarin materi sesuai isi buku, selanjutnya adalah kesadaran siswa (dan orang-orang terdekatnya) untuk terus berlatih di rumah. Ada CD yang bisa di setel sebagai panduan belajar di rumah.

Yamaha Music School juga mendorong rasa percaya diri siswa dengan rajin menyelenggarakan konser. Untuk level lokal biasanya di Mall, jadi di tonton banyak pengunjung. Anak jadi terbiasa tampil di depan banyak orang. Ada juga konser internasionalnya di Jepang. Nah, kalo udah ngrasain konser ke Jepang brarti udah jago banget deh tu. Jago di bakat, minat, kemampuan itu udah pasti.

Selain kelas privat, untuk piano ada juga kelas untuk anak-anak usia balita. Loh, balita di les in piano? Yuph, ini caranya mengenalkan musik secara dini pada anak. Bedanya, di kelas ini anak lebih diajar untuk semacam eksplorasi dan menemukan nada. Jadi belum main lagu utuh.

Menurut para ahli, musik klasik dapat membantu perkembangan otak, meningkatkan konsentrasi dan juga disiplin. Biasanya bila anak-anak yang mulai belajar musik dengan piano atau gitar maka akan lebih mudah mempelajari alat musik lain. Musik klasik banyak disarankan untuk dipelajari sejak dini karna merupakan teknik dasar dari pelajaran musik lainnya seperti pop, jazz dll.

Keponakan gw udah 2x ini ujian piano. Ujian pertamanya sukses, semoga yang kedua ini hasilnya juga baik. Belajarin 1 buku durasinya 6 bulan, ujiannya cuma +5 menit di Yamaha pusat (daerah Semanggi). Selain belajar piano, dia juga mulai tertarik belajar alat musik lain yaitu gitar. Atas dorongan kebawelan, akhirnya di rumah tersedialah 1 unit gitar ukuran sedang dengan janji si keponakan akan bagi waktu untuk lebih rajin latihan piano plus extra time untuk belajar gitar.

Sekian story#2. Yang punya anak/keponakan yuk disupport untuk belajar musik.

Happy reading! Sampai jumpa di next story : )